Monday, 29 October 2012

discussing sex n the booty call

Hey guys, My grls and I decided to go out last week as they saw I was under a lot of stress and needed some cheering up. So we went and invaded Imbizo Thembisa. Wow did I have a good time. Felt really good to let my hair down and enjoy some good company. For a second there I forgot I had work stress,school stress, relationship stress need I say more? Lol but what I truly enjoyed was how the girls knew it was time for an invasion in my life due to the crying I was doing. But that's not the point here.
While sitting there and enjoying our drinks the sex topic came up. Oh my was I excited! 
Its amazing how open women are when it comes to the sex topic. We spoke of it all how to satisfy a man and still have your dignity. How to always be creative in bed and not be called a hoe. I think we forgot we we're attending a function and became ladies night. While sitting there I got to observe the surrounding. I must say most men who we're there are MBA's (married but available) who came with their side kicks or mistresses. So how does it work? Do you get called on his good days? You are just his booty call when his penis feels the urge for you? 
So when he's not in the mood for you what happens?
Friend of mine said never be another mans booty call. Cos thts all you his sex toy. You will get used but know when the sun goes down man will ditch you like yesterdays trash and run home to his family. So when you don't called or only get invitations behind closed doors. Know you are trash. 
Back to sex toys. So than friend says to us she will open up a sex shop just for us to have our own little candy shop lol. Steve harvey once said a man wants a hoe in the bedroom but a lady in public. Meaning get creative under those sheets but be his lady in public. 
A lot of women are scared to explore this chapter but it is up to them. Friend of mine said if you are someones booty call, its sex. You get called for sex and nothing else. No small talk just sex. Sad lmao. Anyhow that's all I can reveal from our girls talk. Signing off 

Wednesday, 24 October 2012

never bottle things up

When the doctor says to you, you must decide what's important your life or the things that are making you sick and stressing you. That is when you need to realise that the rate you going its not going okay. We may not realise it but stress is one of the highest things that can kill a person. You put strain on your heart and body to a point where it gets tired to even function. I'm a person who stresses most of my time and to a extent where I sit and think of solutions day in and out. My cuzin was on drugs for years and we never understood the reason why he did such. He would isolate himself and would go steal to get his next fix. He had a family that cared and provided for him but we would all ask ourselves why is he doing these things??? During his time in rehab he finally spoke out and told us that while he was on drugs his friends n him would take trips to boksburg to the rich peoples home and brake into them. On one occasion they entered a house where they thought no one was home. As they went through the house they found a white women in the house. They tied up the women and made her take out all her belongings. His friend than took out a knife and stabbed her. As they left the house a squad of policemen were waiting for them outside cos the women pressed the panic button. That picture has been haunting him and each time he was not high he would always wonder whatever to the women if she lived or died that is why most of his time he would prefer to be high as he forgets his demons. It doesn't need to be professional help but I say always have a friend or family member to talk to cause holding deep emotions you are killing yourself more each time. As exams are about to start never undermine yourself. Go in there and give it your all. When you stress you forget all the things you learnt and make stupid mistakes. If you have people in your life who stress you or issues think to yourself"why are you stressing when they are going on with their lives not giving a dam about you. " Good luck guys. Live is a journey we're the road is smooth and rough at times but the most important thing is that you achieve your goal. God bless.
BOSS LADY signing off.   

Tuesday, 16 October 2012


So my daughter turned 2 on the 5th October. Proud mom I am I must say. She's driving me insane lately and wanting attention all the time. What can I say she's my kid.
Whenever I come home from a long day at the office I have to make sure that there is time for her. On her birthday I went all out for her. Got her the biggest jumping castle ever and cake. She was sick but managed to have some fun. She's like my best friend even when I yell at her she runs to me and cry lol. holds no grudges and still calls me mom after giving her a hiding.
I'm still yet to learn what it means to be a mom. I've been told n book or website can tell you how to be a parent you just learn as time passes. I know this is odd but every night when she sleeps I watch her and cry because I still can't believe I have such a wonderful beauty. I pray and thank God for all my blessings given.
She's my beauty! I remember while pregnant I would always laugh at ugly babies, I'm sorry guys lmao. my mom would say don't laugh cos you will have one soon. oh well God gave me this angel, and dam she's a beauty. lol
To think I was in so much pain during my pregnancy. I truly believe the saying that says after every storm there is a beautiful rainbow.

great song to start the day....

guys this song just made my day. funny how old songs just keep coming back.

Haven't Met You Yet lyricsSongwriters: Buble, Michael Steven; Chang, Alan; Foster, Amy;
I'm not surprised, not everything lasts
I've broken my heart so many times, I stopped keeping track
Talk myself in, I talk myself out
I get all worked up, then I let myself down

I tried so very hard not to lose it
I came up with a million excuses
I thought, I thought of every possibility

And I know someday that it'll all turn out
You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out
And I promise you, kid, that I give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet

I might have to wait, I'll never give up
I guess it's half timing, and the other half's luck
Wherever you are, whenever it's right
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life

And I know that we can be so amazing
And, baby, your love is gonna change me
And now I can see every possibility

And somehow I know that it'll all turn out
You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out
And I promise you, kid, I give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet

They say all's fair
In love and war
But I won't need to fight it
We'll get it right and we'll be united

And I know that we can be so amazing
And being in your life is gonna change me
And now I can see every single possibility

And someday I know it'll all turn out
And I'll work to work it out
Promise you, kid, I'll give more than I get
Than I get, than I get, than I get

Oh, you know it'll all turn out
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out
And I promise you kid to give so much more than I get
Yeah, I just haven't met you yet

I just haven't met you yet
Oh, promise you, kid
To give so much more than I get

I said love, love, love, love
Love, love, love, love
(I just haven't met you yet)
Love, love, love, love
Love, love
I just haven't met you yet

Monday, 15 October 2012


As I am about to finish one chapter in my life which is completing my BA, a lot has been coming into mind to where do I go from here. I must say it has been a long journey for me, from nursery school to primary school heading off to high school than taking that final leap into university and now it has finally come to an end.
I never thought it would come but it's here, I've spent years planning for this moment but now I'm as confused as ever could be to what I want in my life.
As you know I have a daughter and I am a proud single mom. I have a stable job. Things are going the right way but I feel something is missing.....finding Mr Right! As a parent it becomes difficult to have a partner because that person needs to accept what you come with and be able to love that child.
At the age of 24 I have achieved, I have conquered , I have travelled and yes, I have loved but it's time to settle down and look for that 1 who will love me and my daughter.
Thinking about it I must say it's a hard task ,(lol) hardest task I think I've ever had to face. I'm def not getting younger but these things needs to be faced at some point in life. My mother always tells me, "your daughter forms part of your life and is not your life. " This means that you should never let a child stand in your way from finding true happiness .
Every day she encourages me to go out there and spread my wings. I am not a shy person but here ,OH LORD! I am an introvert lol.
Being a single mom I've been very scared to love because of past experience.
BUT I have faith the lord will bless me when the time is right. It hurts to see people getting loved and I don't but I believe my time is coming. I have been blessed in all aspects I know I will be too soon in this one as well.
At times you find that person who has all the qualities but not available. I am happy but I'm hoping love will find its way to me soon as I have a lot to give.
I would also like to know the feeling  to also be able to run out of the office and say ,I'm going to see my man lol .
Or go on holiday or get sms's during the day to say how much your loved, okay guys enough for now time to get back to reality. It's come to a point where although I am happy my family or people close to me would see my emptiness.

"Remember When It Rained" Josh Groban

Wash away the thoughts inside
That keep my mind away from you.
No more love and no more pride
And thoughts are all I have to do.

Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.
Felt the ground and looked up high
And called your name.
Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.
In the darkness I remain.

Tears of hope run down my skin.
Tears for you that will not dry.
They magnify the one within
And let the outside slowly die.

Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.
I felt the ground and looked up high
And called your name.
Ohhhhhh Remember when it rained.
In the water I remain
Running down
Running down
Running down
Running down
Running down
Running down
Running down

"The Prayer" Josh Groban
(feat. Charlotte Church)

I pray you'll be our eyes
And watch us where we go
And help us to be wise
In times when we don't know

Let this be our prayer
As we go our way
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your Grace
To a place where we'll be safe
La luce che tu dai

I pray we'll find your light
Nel cuore restera
And hold it in our hearts
A ricordarci che
When stars go out each night
L'eterna stella sei
Nella mia preghiera
Let this be our prayer
Quanta fede c'e
When shadows fill our day
Lead us to a place
Guide us with your grace

Give us faith so we'll be safe.
Sogniamo un mondo senza piu violenza

Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza
Ognuno dia la mano al suo vicino
Simbolo di pace e di fraternita

La forza che ci dai
We ask that life be kind
E'il desiderio che
And watch us from above
Ognuno trovi amore
We hope each soul will find
Intorno e dentro a se
Another soul to love

Let this be our prayer
Let this be our prayer
Just like every child
Just like every child

Needs to find a place,
Guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che
Hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salvera

have a great day!

Wednesday, 10 October 2012


Good morning!
life at times never seems to go our way due to certain factors or people in it. It has happened to everyone of us and as we grow older I think we tend to understand it more but when faced in the situation we forget that it's our way of growing up.

Instead of avoiding challenges jump into them. Beat the heck out of them. Enjoy the game. If your challenges are too large or too numerous, do not give up. Failing makes you tired.

Instead, reorganize. Find more determination, more knowledge, more help.Don't create success and lie in it. You have resources, skills and abilities to make a difference. Put a shark in your tank and see how far you can really go!
What takes us back to the past is our memories. What brings us forward is our dreams.
Happiness is always possible, but we have to be open to it, sometimes that means letting go of what we are holding on to. Sometimes you may not get exactly what you thought you wanted, because of hidden blessings you never saw coming.

Tuesday, 9 October 2012


Hey Guys!
sitting here at my desk one of my colleagues is celebrating her and the boyfriends one year's anniversary dating. from the morning she was waiting for him to say something but he was quiet because he had something romantic planned.
After lunch time a call came in from down stairs telling her to come pick up a package. as she walked in she came in with a big bunch of flowers from him.
love makes us do the craziest things and we tend to ask ourselves what is this thing controlling my body??? we fight and say things we do not mean, but the most important part is that we have overcome it. when you love someone you have rainy days and shinny days.
there's nothing so filling as having someone you care about be the last person you speak to or first person you wake up thinking of.
it's not about who you love but how you love. if you fight in the morning with your loved one make sure you don't go to bed without patching things up as you never know when god might take that person away.
yes we all have our bad moments but if your love for someone is able to over look all the bad things than yes your love is meant to be.
accept the person you fall in love with instead of trying to change them. have time to get to know them and surprise them in ways they never thought you will.
Saying sorry is such a hard thing to do but the fact that someone has swallowed their pride and said it makes a big difference.
I would sit with my gals and listen to them talk how they are taking their men away for romantic weekends, there would be no special occasion but it is a way they find it spice up their love and show the men in their lives how loved they are.
guys don't let anger or hatred ruin love between two people but embrace it and learn to say sorry and accept those apologies.
I've lost love and it's never a great thing to go through but because we learn from our mistakes and said sorry it is up to the other person to decide whether they accept it or not.
here is a definition from shakes spear on what love is :

What is love? It is one of the most difficult questions for the mankind. Centuries have passed by, relationships have bloomed and so has love. But no one can give the proper definition of love. To some Love is friendship set on fire for others Maybe love is like luck. You have to go all the way to find it. No matter how you define it or feel it, love is the eternal truth in the history of mankind.  Love is patient, love is kind. It has no envy, nor it boasts itself and it is never proud. It rejoices over the evil and is the truth seeker. Love protects; preserves and hopes for the positive aspect of life. Always stand steadfast in love, not fall into it. It is like the dream of your matter of affection coming true.    Love can occur between two or more individuals. It bonds them and connects them in a unified link of trust, intimacy and interdependence. It enhances the relationship and comforts the soul. Love should be experienced and not just felt. The depth of love cannot be measured. Look at the relationship between a mother and a child. The mother loves the child unconditionally and it cannot be measured at all.   A different dimension can be attained between any relationships with the magic of love. Love can be created. You just need to focus on the goodness of the other person. If this can be done easily, then you can also love easily. And remember we all have some positive aspect in us, no matter how bad our deeds maybe. And as God said Love all
Depending on context, love can be of different varieties. Romantic love is a deep, intense and unending. It shared on a very intimate and interpersonal and sexual relationship.  The term Platonic love, familial love and religious love are also matter of great affection. It is more of desire, preference and feelings. The meaning of love will change with each different relationship and depends more on its concept of depth, versatility, and complexity. But at times the very existence of love is questioned. Some say it is false and meaningless. It says that it never exist, because there has been many instances of hatred and brutality in relationships. The history of our world has witnessed many such events. There has been hatred between brothers, parents and children, sibling rivalry and spouses have failed each other. Friends have betrayed each other; the son has killed his parents for the throne, the count is endless. Even the modern generation is also facing with such dilemmas every day. But love is not responsible for that. It is us, the people, who have forgotten the meaning of love and have undertaken such gruesome apathy.
In the past the study of philosophy and religion has done many speculations on the phenomenon of love. But love has always ruled, in music, poetry, paintings, sculptor and literature. Psychology has also done lot of dissection to the essence of love, just like what biology, anthropology and neuroscience has also done to it. 
Psychology portrays love as a cognitive phenomenon with a social cause. It is said to have three components in the book of psychology: Intimacy, Commitment, and Passion. Also, in an ancient proverb love is defined as a high form of tolerance. And this view has been accepted and advocated by both philosophers and scholars.   Love also includes compatibility. But it is more of journey to the unknown when the concept of compatibility comes into picture. Maybe the person whom we see in front of us, may be least compatible than the person who is miles away. We might talk to each other and portray that we love each other, but practically we do not end up into any relationship. Also in compatibility, the key is to think about the long term successful relationship, not a short journey. We need to understand each other and must always remember that nobody is perfect. 
Be together, share your joy and sorrow, understand each other, provide space to each other, but always be there for each other's need. And surely love will blossom to strengthen your relationship with your matter of affection.
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
William Shakespeare.

 So to those I have hurt I say sorry I will always love you.
"Too many sleepless nights thinking of you, and when I wake up my tears are running side of my cheeks ,thinking how much I want to be with you and I’m going to miss you still. Your tears make me want to change the world so that it won't hurt you anymore...
I don't have to be your first love, but I do want to be your last.
And remember this...never say I love you, if you don't really care...never talk about feelings, if they aren't really there...never touch a life, if you mean to break a heart...never say you're going to, if you don't plan to start...never look me in the eye, when all you do is lie...never say hello, if you really mean good-bye."

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

the start of a new journey

There comes a time in life where you have to start being recognised as an adult in the family.
9 August 2012 my parents made it official by doing a traditional ceremony for me.
It was a very emotional day especially when they said my go well speeches. My friend Thembi was asked to speak, she spoke of the days in high school and reminded me of how fast time flies. yesterday we were in grade 8 starting high school not knowing where our classes are today we are at the peak of our careers with children living happy lives.
My mom reminded me that although I am a women now I should always remember who my elders are. That I must continue to respect my elders as I have the last 23 years of my life.
I cried tears of joy because there is nothing so filling as getting a thumbs up from your parents, saying well done , good luck on your new journey.
They slaughtered a goat in honour to thank my ancestors and god for these blessing they have blessed me with.
To my luck I found out that my goat my pregnant with twins and that meant good luck is yet to come.
As I type this I remember all the hardships my parents have gone for me to make sure I get the best of life.
from the best preschool to the best university. My mom would always say , my child I would rather walk around with a torn dress as long as I know you have received the best education. even if I can die now I know I would have left you with the best inheritance money can education.
so guys as the bible says respect your mother and father in order for you to live a great and fruitful life.
trust me it speaks the truth. I won't lie and say I wasn't  a rebellious teenager because I was but I would always learn to apologise for my mistakes and respect my family.
So I say do unto others as you would like others to do unto you!


Hey bloggers,
wow, it's been a minute! A lot has been happening in my life which has kept me off track.
Firstly let me announce that I am the new copy editor of BONA magazine. At the age of 23 I was able to reach an achievement that most people reach later on in their 30's.
It's been a long and dusty road where I would find myself sending cv's everyday but you know the saying God answers us in rows and my turn was coming..... AND IT FINALLY DID!
I have had days where I would cry asking the lord why am I suffering so much as it was difficult being a single mom, but my god never gave up on me.
I thank all my friends and family who have been there for being there for me and giving me the support I needed. to my haters keep hating cause your hatred has got me somewhere leaving you nowhere.
but there's one specific person I want to acknowledge in this my boyfriend.
through it all he's never given up and stuck through it all with me. I remember on the day of my Bona interview he sent me a sms at 4am wishing me all the luck.
there were days where I had nothing and he would take out his last cent to make sure i have whatever I needed, thank you my love.
I must say I am enjoying my new job, although it is hard to juggle both being at school and work not forgetting being a mom to ntokozo lol.
I have grown as a person and my self confidence has gone from 50 to 180. lol
It's been 6 months now and I am loving every bit of this journey at my new company.
I wake everyday with excitement knowing I'm going to do what I love the most.
so I say to those who have not reached their goal, never give up! keep sending and pushing that paper. hard work and patience will pay off.