Monday, 8 December 2014

The storms that make you strong

I came across a friends Facebook status over the weekend which hit a nerve. Social Media has influenced our lives to the point where we learn and reflect from each other. Although it is something we do not do on purpose it happens.
I have decided to share it with the rest of my bloggers. Please do not look at the spelling mistake but read and understand the words of the writer.

Izolo lokhu U were making people's dreams come true. U fed the needy with your kids money. U travelled countries representing South Africa as a servant, leaving abo Mvelo, Lwandle, Bambatha, Nyezi emuva with no one protecting your family against all odds. U cried daily when u heard stories of infants whom are not being taken care of. U stood up and influenced big Companies like Cell C to help U feed the needy and the orphans. U left Your mother waya emazweni... U took out money from your own pocket and paid school fees of girls from Tanzania ( Dara Salam) who were prostitutes and they changed since that day to become an asset to that country. U represented South Africa in African Countries until u were honoured by the Shakur family as the 2pac wase Mzansi. Nkosi sikelela I Africa if this is how we going to honour and celebrate our heroes downfall... Zola I believe in u, I don't care what the media is saying about U. This is not a downfall to U... This is a temporary set back. U'll bounce back. Ngizokulinda uzubuye.The devil and his people ngeke balunge. Qina ndoda ekhaya babheke wena. I wish Steve Biko was still alive to see this stupid journalist who celebrate the downfall of a black man... not just a man but a Hero to many. I salute u #Hola_7

After I read this I saw myself going back to Youtube to reflect on this guy’s work and how hard he had worked and achieve over the years. Due to life things went wrong for him and society lost faith in him. We have grown up in life that we don’t remember the hustle we went through to get where we are in life. I grew up in a family were I hardly saw my parents. I never share this story but I recently had an incident with someone who decided to judge me without knowing my story or where I am from. They see my Facebook posts or pictures on Instagram thinking this girl thinks she is the best thing since sliced bread. He said I was a person who needed constant affirmation about my looks that I never care about others but myself.
Growing up I was the only child from my mom and dad. I spent my life around cousins but to me they are my brothers and sisters. Imagine a 4 room house in Zola Soweto with more than 5 kids living with their granny. Well that’s how life was. My parents believed that they will never depend or wait for the government. They started businesses in Soweto. I won’t sugar coat anything because by me telling this story I feel I need to tell it like it was. When I was little while living in Klipspriut with my mom and dad, some men came to my parents’ house. They took everything in the house. When I asked my mom why they were taking our furniture my mom told me we were moving to granny’s house in Zola so there was not enough space to put all our belongings. Only to find out later when I grew up that was a lie. My parents were deep in debt that they had some of their furniture repossessed.
We moved to granny’s house were my parents were in the taxi business and owned a butchery in Emndeni Soweto. Life was okay as at that age as I never understood what really was happening. My parent’s had goals, but the most important goal was to take me to the best school. At the time I was at St Martin’s private school. Every day there was a transport that would drop me off and pick me up. One day my parents told me they didn’t have enough money to take me to school due to finances. It has tough but my parents never gave up on life as they saw that they had goals to achieve no matter what.
I eventually left St Martin’s and my parents enrolled me in another school. During those times taxi violence was very high. They took a decision to sell their taxis and move on to other business venture. Jobs were low and times were tough. My dad decided to go look for a job, now imagine for being a boss to calling someone else boss. He loved his family and I guess that is the man he is. He always puts his family first.
My mom had a love for fashion so she went back to her old job. She worked at John Orr’s which was a fantastic clothing store during those days. Life moved on and my parents decided it was time to buy land because living at granny’s house was not the end of them. They found a plot of land in Naturena and slowly but surely built the house.
It took them years to build the house. There was no electricity or hot water but to them they saw it as a home, their home. That was not the end of their bad luck as robbers saw that they needed to help themselves to whatever was in the house. On many occasions the house was broken into and nothing was left. Did this make my parents give up? No! They worked even harder. I remember being so embarrassed at school when my dad came fetch me in his van while all the other kids got picked up in fancy cars. I was a kid, I didn’t understand life.
My mom saw a business opportunity and decided it was time to start her own company. She would get on many taxis every day to get clothing orders from stores in Sandton, East Gate and Hyde Park. One day a lady who usually gave her orders decided to give her a workshop where she can work from instead of travelling around. Little did we know this would be the beginning of a new life for my mom? Her business grew until she eventually started her own clothing Boutique at Hyde Park Shopping Centre. Today she is making waves.
My dad was a bus driver for 15 years at Metro Bus. I am so proud of him because together with my mom they took me to the best schools. They taught me no matter what life throws at you, you pick your head up and try again.
Now for those who are constantly putting other people down I hope by reading my story you understand that do not wish for someone else’s life as you do not know the hard times  they had to endure to get where they are in life. Yes I make sure I look good every dam day of my life because I work hard for it. My family has struggled enough to live the life they are living and have offered to me.
I do not care what other’s think because while they are talking I’m busy hustling. I believe that in life never judge someone without getting to know them. People will judge you no matter what you do. You just need to keep on trying until you make it. I had a child before marriage, SO WHAT? That did not stop me from achieving my goals but it gave me strength to work harder and grow. Today i look at my life and think yes I am somewhere it might not be where I want to be but it is defiantly not where I started.
The time you spend gossiping on other people’s lives, you could be making something from your own life.  Yes I am not perfect but I wake up every morning and say thank you lord let the hustle continue.
Nothing in life is ever wrong. We learn from every step we take. Whatever you did today was a necessary step to get to tomorrow. So be proud of yourself. Maybe you are not good as you want to be but be thankful to all lessons you have learnt along the way, you are so much better than you used to be.
People love saying everything will be okay, but sometimes it’s just not true. Sometimes you hit a brick wall to a point of exhaustion. You may even feel strong and have good intention, yet still get mercilessly beaten down and defeated. We get hurt in life with different things that happen but there comes a time of healing. It does not mean the damage never existed, it just means that the damage no longer controls your life.
Steve jobs once said, “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

God Bless
Boss Lady signing off.