I fall but i dust myself up!

Sunday I reached out to a friend and they didn't have the time for me, they didn't care and it seemed that they were not giving a dam about what I needed. I'm a very giving person . I left it  but as soon as I heard this song it filled my heart. it's amazing how much a song can make you smile.
I might have fallen but that's not the important part , the important part is dusting yourself and keeping your head up in the  game. those who are there for you only through good times and never through hard times are ones you should always question Amanda would always say to me. lol anyhow I speak my mind , don't hold my grudges or heart because that will make one old and dam I'm too fine for getting old!




Living Years lyrics

Every generation blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door
I know that I'm a prisoner
To all my father held so dear
I know that I'm a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him
In the living years
More crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thought
Stilted conversations
I'm afraid that's all we've got
You say you just don't see it
He says it's perfect sense
You just can't get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defence
CHORUS
Say it loud
Say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye
[ From : http://www.elyrics.net/read/m/mike-&-the-mechanics-lyrics/living-years-lyrics.html ]
So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It's the bitterness that lasts
So don't yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different day
And if you don't give up
And don't give in
You may just be O.K.
CHORUS
I wasn't there that morning
When my father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say
I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
I'm sure I heard his echo
In my baby's new born tears
I just wish I could have told him
In the living years
CHORUS

Heart Attack lyrics
ohhhhh ohhhhh
We share, somethin' so common, still so rare,
and I'm in awe, never been here before,
so high, we're still climbing,
even here inside these walls,
breaking each others hearts,
and we don't care 'cause we're so,
in too deep can't think about givin' it up,
but i never knew love, would feel like a heart attack,
it's killing me, swear i never cried so much,
'cause i never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had, Ohhhhh
never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had,
All the times when i know i should be smilin',
seem to be the time, that i frowned the most,
can't believe that we're still survivin',
'cause I'm slowly breakin' down,
even when i hold you close,
And if i lose you,
I'm afraid i would lose who,
who i gave my love to,
that's the reason i stay around,

even though i fell way,
[| From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/t/trey-songz-lyrics/heart-attack-lyrics.html |]
in too deep can't think about givin' it up,
but i never knew love, would feel like a heart attack,
it's killing me, swear i never cried so much,
'cause i never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had, Ohhhhhh
never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had,
and it hurts, cause i wanna leave,
and you wanna leave,
but the love keeps us together,
And if i lose you,
I'm afraid i would lose who,
who i gave my love to,
that's the reason i stay around,
even though i fell way,
in too deep can't think about givin' it up, oh
but i never knew love, would feel like a heart attack,
it's killing me, swear i never cried so much,
'cause i never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had, Ohhhhh
never knew love, would hurt this fucking bad,
worst pain that i ever had

penny for my thoughts!

two weeks till the boss lady turn 24years old....
at the age of 24 I have a beautiful baby girl, I am copy editor of one of South Africa's top selling magazines, I have completed my schooling and have moving out of home.
it's been a fucken long road( excuse my French ) but really it has. I have lost and gained friends but all I have kept my faith high and my god keeps blessing me.
not sure what my plans for my birthday are but I plan on having loads of fun. I reflect on the past year and thank god for blessing me with another number to add on to my years on earth.
can't believe just yesterday I was daddy's little girl and now I'm all grown up.
this year god showed me wonders and we all know when god shows up he shows off!
before I know it I will be 30 soon ,lol
so anyway this week at work there is an intern who wanted to come see the kind of work I do. wasn't so keen on doing it but I'm not the kind of person who is selfish so I took her in.
she's arrived here so shy and scared reminded me of my first day of being an intern.
I'm teaching as much as I can but the end of the day it is up to her to what she makes of life.
help others because you never know when you might as well need help.
next year I plan on buying my dream car. if you dream it , than it will happen. merc here I come.
I dream and set goals for myself because I see it as a way to guide me. I dream big but I work my ass off as well.
life does not stop at 21 but it begins at 21. to those who think they will not make it , it's all in the mind. let your haters hate because they will be at the bottom and you will be at the top saying fuckers I told you so. lol anyhow guys that's just me.
enjoy your day.

THE GIRLS!

when I first came to Bona magazine I didn't know what was my reason for coming here but I am blessed to have such a wonderful family.
I met 5 wonderful girls who have brought joy to me . come rain or sunshine they are always there for you and will never judge you for what you are. we come from worlds apart but god has brought us together.
You may meet a person and instantly know that you will be best friends forever. Other friendships develop over an extended period of time. In some friendships you may feel a sense of equality, while in others there may be a clear sense that one is giving more to the friendship then the other. There are no rules about how a friendship has to be. If you are able to share your life with another human being, by all means go right ahead. All friendships are unique and special in their own way. Each one is valuable.

HAVING FUN WITH THE GALS

MANDY

NELLY

NONKU

NQO

MASI

Will You Ever

I don't think you will
Ever fully understand
How you've touched my life and made me who I am
I don't think you could ever know
Just how truly special you are
That even on the darkest nights
You are my brightest star
You've allowed me to experience something very hard to find
Unconditional love that exists
In my body soul and mind
I don't think you could ever feel
All the love I have to give
And I'm sure you'll never realize
You've been my will to live
You are an amazing person
And without you I don't know where I'd be
Having you in my life
Completes and fulfills every part of me.

Our Friendship

© Marcia M. Griffith

As I think of our friendship, I begin to see
Mere words can't describe what you mean to me.
When this cold, hard world has me lonesome and blue
I look up to see my angel, my sweet angel, you.

You dry the tears that fall from my eyes.
You bring me sunshine to brighten my sky.
You rescue me when I'm scared and alone
And take my hand to lead me home.

No matter the miles that keep us apart
We're always together in each other's hearts
Sometimes we take for granted, I fear,
The ones who are so close and dear.

We get so caught up in life and things we must do
Sometimes we forget to stop and say I love you.
If ever you felt I forgot or didn't care
Let me stop right now, my true feelings I'll share.

You're the sun in my sky, the bed where I lie.
You're the home where I'm safe, the field where I play.
You're everything I am, everything I do.
So what I am saying is I LOVE YOU!

THANK YOU GIRLZ . MUCH LOVE!

Where ever our roads might take us I pray that God will continue to guide you and keep the friendship we have!

SUNDAY BLESSINGS

So it's the end of exams and I thought life would get less stressful but I've realised that as 1 grows the more responsibility one takes one. I'll be growing a year older in two weeks to come and I must say its shit exciting but scary.
Decided to go to church today. We had holy communion. Although I don't know we're tomorrow will take me but my god has already set out my journey.
I'm grateful for the downfalls I've had in my life because it makes it shows the devil that yes my God does live.
The power of God is greater than your problems.
We all have our own problems in life but that is why we are there. To learn and strengthen ourselves. If a person comes to you and asks for your help never turn your back on them because God has never turned his back on you. Take time to assist those who need help because you never know when the tables will turn.
Don't play with the blessings you are given. There are homes we're they do not know we're they will get their next meal. There will come a time we're the world will turn will turn their backs on you. Even the ones you love. But remember this God will never forsake you or turn his back on you. When the lord saw his people he said to them peace be with you. Deuteronomy 16 speaks of how people should give according to the blessings of the lord your god has given you.
I may not know the troubles you go through, I may not know the hurdles you have faced , I may not the nights you have cried asking for help but no human had time for you , I may not the many prayers you have said but because the lord has always been there you we're able to pass and conquer it all.
Those are the words I received today at church from our priest. Felt like he was talking to me but we all have our days we're we need god n one another. Happy Sunday guys.

discussing sex n the booty call

Hey guys, My grls and I decided to go out last week as they saw I was under a lot of stress and needed some cheering up. So we went and invaded Imbizo Thembisa. Wow did I have a good time. Felt really good to let my hair down and enjoy some good company. For a second there I forgot I had work stress,school stress, relationship stress need I say more? Lol but what I truly enjoyed was how the girls knew it was time for an invasion in my life due to the crying I was doing. But that's not the point here.

While sitting there and enjoying our drinks the sex topic came up. Oh my was I excited! 

Its amazing how open women are when it comes to the sex topic. We spoke of it all how to satisfy a man and still have your dignity. How to always be creative in bed and not be called a hoe. I think we forgot we we're attending a function and became ladies night. While sitting there I got to observe the surrounding. I must say most men who we're there are MBA's (married but available) who came with their side kicks or mistresses. So how does it work? Do you get called on his good days? You are just his booty call when his penis feels the urge for you? 

So when he's not in the mood for you what happens?

Friend of mine said never be another mans booty call. Cos thts all you his sex toy. You will get used but know when the sun goes down man will ditch you like yesterdays trash and run home to his family. So when you don't called or only get invitations behind closed doors. Know you are trash. 

Back to sex toys. So than friend says to us she will open up a sex shop just for us to have our own little candy shop lol. Steve harvey once said a man wants a hoe in the bedroom but a lady in public. Meaning get creative under those sheets but be his lady in public. 

A lot of women are scared to explore this chapter but it is up to them. Friend of mine said if you are someones booty call, its sex. You get called for sex and nothing else. No small talk just sex. Sad lmao. Anyhow that's all I can reveal from our girls talk. Signing off 

never bottle things up

When the doctor says to you, you must decide what's important your life or the things that are making you sick and stressing you. That is when you need to realise that the rate you going its not going okay. We may not realise it but stress is one of the highest things that can kill a person. You put strain on your heart and body to a point where it gets tired to even function. I'm a person who stresses most of my time and to a extent where I sit and think of solutions day in and out. My cuzin was on drugs for years and we never understood the reason why he did such. He would isolate himself and would go steal to get his next fix. He had a family that cared and provided for him but we would all ask ourselves why is he doing these things??? During his time in rehab he finally spoke out and told us that while he was on drugs his friends n him would take trips to boksburg to the rich peoples home and brake into them. On one occasion they entered a house where they thought no one was home. As they went through the house they found a white women in the house. They tied up the women and made her take out all her belongings. His friend than took out a knife and stabbed her. As they left the house a squad of policemen were waiting for them outside cos the women pressed the panic button. That picture has been haunting him and each time he was not high he would always wonder whatever to the women if she lived or died that is why most of his time he would prefer to be high as he forgets his demons. It doesn't need to be professional help but I say always have a friend or family member to talk to cause holding deep emotions you are killing yourself more each time. As exams are about to start never undermine yourself. Go in there and give it your all. When you stress you forget all the things you learnt and make stupid mistakes. If you have people in your life who stress you or issues think to yourself"why are you stressing when they are going on with their lives not giving a dam about you. " Good luck guys. Live is a journey we're the road is smooth and rough at times but the most important thing is that you achieve your goal. God bless.

BOSS LADY signing off.   

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PUFFINS

So my daughter turned 2 on the 5th October. Proud mom I am I must say. She's driving me insane lately and wanting attention all the time. What can I say she's my kid.

Whenever I come home from a long day at the office I have to make sure that there is time for her. On her birthday I went all out for her. Got her the biggest jumping castle ever and cake. She was sick but managed to have some fun. She's like my best friend even when I yell at her she runs to me and cry lol. holds no grudges and still calls me mom after giving her a hiding.

I'm still yet to learn what it means to be a mom. I've been told n book or website can tell you how to be a parent you just learn as time passes. I know this is odd but every night when she sleeps I watch her and cry because I still can't believe I have such a wonderful beauty. I pray and thank God for all my blessings given.

She's my beauty! I remember while pregnant I would always laugh at ugly babies, I'm sorry guys lmao. my mom would say don't laugh cos you will have one soon. oh well God gave me this angel, and dam she's a beauty. lol

To think I was in so much pain during my pregnancy. I truly believe the saying that says after every storm there is a beautiful rainbow.